I used to have a romanticized idea of what it was like to be married. Based on stories other people told me, I used to think that one day when I got married, my husband and I would sit on the porch, sipping coffee, and watching the sun rise together.
I think I still dream about this one day because it sounds really nice. And the person who told me her and her husband did this every morning, really does this. But this is their story and not mine but thinking it was the story for all marriages surely could have set me up for dissapointment.
The thing is my husband gets up at 5:00 am to go to work. The sun is not going to rise for at least another hour depending on the time of year. And the other thing, he doesn't drink coffee and I drink it only a few times a month. Obviously this porch sitting morning lifestyle does not fit into our everyday life. Such a setting is only in my dreams...because at 5:00 am, I am still sleeping.
So just recently I started getting up with my husband in the mornings. I have tried doing this in the past and it lasted a day. But this time I have been able to maintain this early wakeup for a few weeks now.
Starting our mornings together has been really good for us. It also has been really good for me.
Having another 20 minutes together in the beginning of our day is time together. I like to think that by choosing to get up so early for the only reason but to see my husband, hopefully is some kind of blessing to him. I make him breakfast and pack his lunch. We have been trying to pull back financially and the simple act of making him eggs every morning instead of his usual bowl of cereal is saving us money!
Not only is the time together good for us but starting my day so much earlier is doing wonders for me. I am able to accomplish so much more in my day having more morning hours where I am most productive. I tidy up the kitchen, pick up the house, have my quiet time, eat breakfast, and sometimes work out all before the sun is rising or my nephew shows up for the day. I am a happy person when my to do list is practically done by 9:00 am!
So maybe your husband does not go to work at 5:00 am and you already are up every morning together. Maybe it is your week nights or weekends that are harder to touch base with your spouse. Whatever it is, would you be willing to give something small up...another hour of sleep, your favorite show, one week night workout a week, book club, or some other fill in the blank thing you do for yourself, and see what happens if you gave that time to your husband? Would it bless your marriage? Would it bless you? I think it will. And if it doesn't, it doesn't have to be forever. But is your marriage worth it to at least give it a chance? I hope it is.
// What could you give up this week to have a little more time with your spouse?
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I agree... every marriage has its own story for sure, and the comparison game can be dangerous. My husband and I have a long standing tradition of "Hot Tub Summit" very early most mornings, during which we drink that first cup of coffee and sit in the hot tub outside, watching the stars disappear and usually the sunrise. This is the time of day he is most likely to talk openly, sort out his impending work day, get connected with me. And I have noticed that on the days we skip for some reason, he is off balance. I know it's special for us, so it's a ritual we protect. Great post, thank you! xoxo
ReplyDeleteThat is an awesome ritual!
DeleteGreat wisdom. Doing it from the beginning of your marriage will keep bad habits from creeping in and destroying the love in your marriage! What you are talking about is really self-less-ness... and it's a hard thing to practice, but pays BIG in the end!!
ReplyDeleteGirl. You wrote this STRAIGHT to my heart. This EXACT get up your husband conviction has been stewing in me for the past week!!! I think you just tipped me over the edge. THANK YOU for letting God speak to me through YOU!
ReplyDeletexx
Elise
www.cheersyall-thehoustons.blogspot.com
I struggled with this for years. I finally am able to get up with my husband and help him start his day off right~~I'm thrilled that I get to help him begin his day on a positive note!!
ReplyDeleteWow! I just started doing this with my husband this past week! Perfect timing for your post. My husband has told me on several mornings how much he enjoys it when I'm up with him. I make breakfast for him (I used to think that was so 1950's, but i've changed my mind!) we pray together and talk about the upcoming day. It makes me feel closer and connected to him!
ReplyDeleteWow! I just started doing this with my husband this past week! Perfect timing for your post. My husband has told me on several mornings how much he enjoys it when I'm up with him. I make breakfast for him (I used to think that was so 1950's, but i've changed my mind!) we pray together and talk about the upcoming day. It makes me feel closer and connected to him!
ReplyDeleteWow lady, you are a real blessing in my life tonight - this is exactly what I have been struggling with lately too... my hubs also gets up early for work and I love my sleep, I am not a morning person. But I have been trying my best to get up early for him and with him, and it has done wonders for us too. It's not every day though, so I have a bit of work to do x
ReplyDeleteI love having extra time with my husband in the mornings. It such a nice way for us to connect before going our separate ways.
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